Today marks my third year of sustained sobriety. (In this decade of life, lol)
I think we all know this isn’t my first rodeo. I’ve relapsed more often than a tik-tok dance goes viral.
I’m actually not big on the counting thing, I think it places undue pressure and creates this myth that the more days you have the wiser you are somehow. I can unequivocally say that this is not the case because I have attended meetings with people that had loads of time but didn’t seem happy and free at all. It can also create a sense of dread and fear in the addict that is contemplating getting clean & sober, forever is such a very long time.
Without further ado…here follows my list of things I’ve learned:
- I can do hard things There have been some gargantuan fuckups and traumas: ‘Detoxing – rehabbing’ myself whilst looking after two children; unemployment and money worries; moving halfway across the country to a place where I knew no-one; illness & death of my mother; epic marital challenges and a global pandemic. I managed to get through all of these things without necking Gin. That’s is no minor miracle, I can tell you that for nothing!
- Mornings are fucking awesome I’ve gone from dreading and loathing mornings loving them. It’s my favourite part of the day. I get up every day without having to piece last night’s events together like a schizophrenic puzzle wondering what my evil twin did while I wasn’t there.
- I love yoga & dare I say… exercise. At the risk of sounding like a cliché ‘sober sparkly’ person on Instagram, I have actually come to look forward to my yoga classes and even some (not all) forms of exercise. It makes me feel better and really is the only antidepressant I know of that actually works.
- The middle way is where it’s at The middle way describes the middle ground between attachment and aversion, between being and non-being, between form and emptiness, between free will and determinism. This is where all of the yin & yang business really starts making sense:)
- Pajamas and loungewear is the future Life is far too short to spend in uncomfortable underwire, push up bras and clothes that are too tight. Embrace the elasticated waistband and answer the siren call of soft ‘old lady’ velour fabric tracksuits, they are the closest thing to heaven you can get on earth.
I’m grateful for every sober day and grateful for every sober friend I’ve made along the road, you guys are like gold dust.
Peace out sober peeps.